How To Know When You’re Ready To Propose To Your Partner

Deciding to get engaged is one of the most significant decisions that you will make in your life. And while there are no one-size-fits-all answers to knowing when to propose, there are things that you need to consider. This article will walk you through everything that you need to know before buying an engagement ring.

You And Your Partner Want To Get Married

While obvious, if you haven’t had the conversation, going out to buy an engagement ring and surprising them may be a surprise too far. Make sure you are aligned with what you both want. And there is a difference between a long-term relationship and getting married and spending the rest of your life together.

This conversation should feel natural. If you find yourself stumbling through the conversation and feeling spooked, then it is worth asking yourself if you are ready to be engaged as well.

You Are Both Emotionally Ready

You can tell a lot about yourself, your partner and your relationship in how you handle difficult conversations. Do you see the other person as the problem, or do you tackle the problem together? Is there mutual respect and open communication?

Marriage is a journey and you will need to work through tough situations. If you find that you, your partner and your relationship can weather emotional storms, communicate effectively, and respect each other’s boundaries, you may have a strong foundation for marriage.

Another key green flag is whether you feel comfortable being completely yourself around each other. Do you and your partner feel safe being vulnerable? If you both feel secure in your relationship and support each other’s growth, that’s a strong sign that you’re ready to commit.

You Have Financial Alignment

While you may not share bank accounts or household expenses, it is one of the most important things to assess when thinking about getting engaged. Money is one of the top reasons couples argue.

Financial alignment is about seeing eye to eye on how you spend, save and invest. If one of you is a spender and the other is a saver, you will need to work out a plan for managing money that keeps you both comfortable.

It is also worth talking about how you plan to handle finances after marriage. Will you continue to have separate bank accounts or combine them? Having clarity will help avoid future misunderstandings especially when you plan to move overseas or buy a house.

It’s also worth considering whether both of you are in a stable financial position, particularly if you're thinking about major expenses like a wedding, buying a house, or starting a family.

You Get Along With Each Other’s Families

When you marry someone, you are not marrying just them — you are also marrying into their family. And family dynamics can play a huge role in a relationship.

It’s important to evaluate your current relationship with their family. Do you feel accepted and respected? Do they get along with your family? While every family has its quirks and challenges, it’s important that you’ve found a way to navigate these relationships without constant conflict. If either of you feels disrespected or undervalued by the other’s family, it’s crucial to address these issues before proposing.

In some cases, setting boundaries with families may be necessary. Marriage often requires balancing the needs of your new life together with family expectations.

You Share Long Term Goals

Compatibility isn’t just about having a great time together or having similar personalities. It’s also about aligning on major life decisions and long-term goals. Marriage is a partnership, and having shared values and visions for the future will help you build a strong, lasting relationship.

One major area to discuss is career goals — especially when most people get engaged just when their careers are taking off. If one of you plans to take a job that requires frequent relocation or long hours, it’s important that both partners are comfortable with how that will impact your relationship.

It is also super important to talk about whether or not you want children and how you envision raising them. These are big conversations that shouldn’t be postponed until after the wedding. In fact, I believe it is important to have these conversations before getting engaged.

You should also think about where you want to live, how you’ll manage work-life balance, and what kind of lifestyle you both want to lead.

You Share Cultural Norms

Do you both have compatible lifestyles when it comes to day-to-day living? For example, if one of you is extremely tidy and the other is more relaxed about cleaning, have you talked about how to handle that in a shared space? These may seem like small issues, but they can become significant if not addressed early on.

If you haven’t lived together, it is worth talking about how you handle chores, life admin, bills and your social calendar. It is also important to consider how you both view gender roles. This is super important and may harbour resentment if not addressed early.

Planning A Proposal?

Now that you’ve thought through the emotional, financial, and practical aspects, it’s time to consider the engagement ring and proposal itself. While the proposal is a moment you’ll both remember for a lifetime, it doesn’t have to be over-the-top or extravagant to be meaningful. Think about what would make your partner feel special and loved.

And when you are looking for a bespoke engagement ring or want to know what is possible, we would love to hear from you. Our custom bespoke engagement ring process will ensure that you can get exactly what you want. We have even written a guide on how to design an engagement ring. We will also work within your budget.